A Small Review (^^!)

“bbrp hr ini gejolak diriku serasa memuncak, entah mengapa hidup ini terasa hampa.. apakah ini artinya sudah saat nya aq memiliki pendamping hidup agar aq bisa kluar dr kehampaan ini? tp apakah itu alasan kita mencari pendamping hidup.

aq tau ada byk alasan knp seseorg harus menikah.. ibadah, menjauhkan fitnah, membangun kluarga, mendapatkan keturunan, dan lain.. tp entah knp bagiku ada yg mengganjal sehingga menghalangi niatanku utk kesana..

aq bukan lah manusia yg tanpa dosa.. aq memiliki dosa2 yg sudah tak terbayangkan besarnya… “

- March 2008 -

that was my draft on March which i almost forget about ^_^! I never had the chance to finish that post, that is why perhaps I never put it on publish

anyway… now thing has turn out pretty well for me.. life is really colorfull ever since I met my dearest, but I think putting up the above post would be a good thing for me to apreciate what i have now even more. (^_^)v

Promise Kept Dear (^^)v

last weekend, I wen to Japan Expo at PRJ Kemayoran with my dear.. we look some corporate booths in the fair, but what I really want to see was japanese foods okonomiyaki and takoyaki n I found it (^^)v heuheu… my 1st time having takoyaki n okonomiyaki

but no pain no gain, so many ppl want to buy those foods, so i have to wait in the line in the crowd, but luckily my dear found a spot for her to sit, we don’t want her to collapse, do we

after waiting for almost an hour, my order was ready, n I get 2 onigiris along the way n we ready to eat the food…

Ittadakimasu… (^^)d

finally get to see okonomiyaki… looks like bakwan :-/

so this is takoyaki

after went to Japan Expo, at night, we went to see 007 new series, Quantum of Solace at Studio XXI.

it was raining the whole day, I went home pretty late that night waiting the rain to stop

story continue….

yesterday was the “worst” day of my life why? because I have to keep my self from the temptation of Caza Suki menus >.<

yes, our 3rd party invited us for a lunch at a japanese self service restaurant, right on the day I do my compulsory monday fasting T.T

my co-workers advice me to break my fast, cause its not really necessary to fast, but then again, I made a promise to myself that I will regularly do my monday-thursday compulsory fast as this is one of my commitment to the lord for giving me the chance to be with her, and I intend to keep that commitment.

as I informed the situation to my dear, she was laughing n said that i will be tempted (cause in her opinion, I get temped easily (^^;) )

but as u see my dear, I kept my promise, I get through that 2 hours hell without any regret (^^)d

dodol… dipanas2in gw neh >.<

OMG… I want that crab T.T

finally its all over >.<

well… not so tough after all (^^)v food surviving is not something imposible, but poor the 3rd party guy, he has to pay for my share in the bill eventhou I didn’t touch any of the foods (^^!)

Great moments at Dufan… n more to come.. (^^)d

okay, i found a good picture of me and her that day at dufan

hehehe…

this is me and her after lunch..

aren’t we match to each other (^^!)

this is when we prepared for Kora Kora

From left to right, Mega her sister, Budi her  senior at college who also happen to be my best friend, Maya my dearest one, and ofcourse, the ugly one is me (>.<!)

This is when we were on the ride (>.<)

that was thrilling (^^)d

this is the relaxed moment after Istana Boneka

hehehe… i think its more than enough pics about my weekend to dufan with her, her sister n my best friend

P.S. we prepare to go to Sea World next month… (^^)v

Starting from Scratch.. A New Tale… About Me and You..

All I can say is, “Alhamdulillah”, last night we talked about our situation… after discussion about many things regarding me and her, she decided to start everything from the beginning.. OMG, I was glad, it feels really relieving. she hasn’t accept me entirely yet, especially about my past, but she will learn to love me, as she said the feeling was gone after confession about my past.. T.T but i offer her to help her back on her feet, get her motivation in life, have faith in a relationship. I’ll be by your side all the way dear, i promised u i won’t let u down, n i don’t wanna loose u either, cause I’ll be loosing my world by the time I’m loosing u >.< that is something i don’t dare to think to happen T.T i promised her, if she had the will, patience and leave the rest to Allah, i’m sure we’ll get what we want from this relationship.. a happy ending…

anyway, we’ve put everything back in place, hopefully someday, she can accept me entirely, n i wish when that day come, she will be ready to moving forward with me (^^)

as for today, we went to dufan (Dunia Fantasi – Dream world) along with her lil sister and her senior in college who also happen to be my best friend. he was late by the way, so we went to dufan after dzuhur, arrive at 1o’clock. wew.. i thought we wouldn’t make it to get to the best rides, but i was WRONG!! we get to kicir2 (power surge, 15 minutes queue), tornado (45 minutes queue), halilintar (roller coaster, 15 minutes queue) and kora2 (Swinging boat, 15 minutes queue), n the queue r around 15-45 minutes!! wow… what a day, we also went to istana boneka (dolls castle) and take the ontang anting and bianglala (windmill), but my dear was having nausious n throw up after get to ontang anting, weird, cause she was okay taking the other extreme rides (T.T)

eniwei, we went back at 7 pm, copy the pictures we were taking in dufan (i’ll put them here if i have the time ^^;) so many pictures of her lil sister actually (^^!) at least me n my dear got some really good shot together (^^).. 6 hours fun is really exhausting, i’m a bit sleepy while writing this entry >.< we plan to go to sea world next month, hopefully we have some money to spare for recreation ^^;

its been a really exhasting wiken for me n my dear, so i think we deserve the best wiken so far, yet more to come ^^; i’m really happy that we stil in the relationship n hopefully we’ll be in this journey for a very long long time

oh, btw, i think my dear will monitoring this blog from now on, so i think this is no longer a my secret place for her (^^;) so i must write a good things about her, otherwise, she will hang my head >.< i mean, my heart ^^; j/k dear.. u r perfect, even while riding ontang anting

I Luv U my Dear, thanks for this 2nd chance u gave yourself and me, we’ll start this fairy tale n we’ll end it with happily ever after together.. Insya Allah o:-)

Morning Messages..

SMS #1

“d jadiin aja kdufannya,,maybe it ‘ll be our last trip hehe,, “

SMS #2

“i dont to make d same mistakes twice,,hm2,if they come here,just pretend nothing happen,,i dont want to make them disapointed,,”

SMS #3

“to open my heart for same kind of man,,”

SMS #4

“till now,,its hard for me to face it,,please dont ask me to open my heart aain, it was closed,,”

those r the messages that she sent me this morning.. my tears keep falling while i read those messages, n i keep reading it till now.. (T.T)

“d jadiin aja kdufannya,,maybe it ‘ll be our last trip hehe,, “

I don’t want it to be our last trip, i was planning to take u to dufan for a while now n it happen to be the same as budi wants, that’s why i got so excited about it, if u remember carefully dear, we weren’t in a relationship back then when i planned this trip we are about to start our journey together.. (T.T)

“i dont to make d same mistakes twice,,hm2,if they come here,just pretend nothing happen,,i dont want to make them disapointed,,”

if u think u’ll be making mistake by choosing to be with me, i assure u won’t, i’ll treasure u for the rest of my life.. i have nottin’ now, my world evolve around u since u accept me, i have to asked my friends for advice so i don’t make wrong move in this situation. please remember why u accepted me in the first place.. (T.T)

“to open my heart for same kind of man,,”

perhaps the man i WAS, was the same as him. but dear, the way i am NOW is not the same as him n the way i am NOW is not the same as i WAS.

“till now,,its hard for me to face it,,please dont ask me to open my heart again, it was closed,,”

thats the reality about me dear, i have the worst past that i have to live with, i’m not proud of it, but i think how am i doing now that defines me.. perhaps if i dont have those experience, i might be a different person now, n u probably wouldnt like it either way.. all i know that i got 2nd chance from 4JJI n i’ve promised my self i will make the best of it, especially after i met u, 4JJI is soo merciful to guide me along the way n make it work out between us.. if your heart already open for me, please i’m begging u on my knees not to close it.. if your heart hasn’t been open for me, please let me stay in front of your heart to wait until it open up for me. please dont shut me off from ur life… (T.T)

u don’t have to face my past dear, cause i already face it n get through it, i made out this far while bleeding n crying.. all i want u to do is look at me now, see through me.. cause u might not gonna find a man better than me..

-while listening PeterPan “Kisah Cintaku” -

P.S.

I Luv U (T.T)